Today was a strong day.
I’d managed a bath and some make-up before leaving the house.
I’d even made a broccoli, cauliflower and Stilton slushi – I mean soup! It looked quite unfriendly but warmed the soul.
I knew today would be a better day at about 11am when I took a call from my mom,
“I’m coming over, let’s go do something?!”
I smiled from ear to ear. A wave of excitement came over me,
A reason to get out of bed.
A reason to wash – brush my teeth even!
A reason to look pretty.
A reason to try a new wig – be someone new.
A reason to be happy and grateful for another day.
I felt so happy inside. As my feet touched the ground I said ‘Thank’. ‘You’. Just as I’d been taught by The Secret.
I declared I was going to win this day and stood up💪.
My mom arrived not long after I’d got out of the bath so she waited for me to become assembled.
Normally she runs on BPT (Black People Time) but today she was early. More time to spend with meeeeee!
“What’s that all over your walls?” my mom asked squinting as she got settled on my bed.
I guess you’re now wondering what it is too?
They’re not revision notes – I’m not that smart.
They’re not reminders – I’m not that organised.
They’re positivity notes and super cute.
Last year at my birthday meal one of my bestest friends presented me with a jar.
365 handwritten notes to help me feel loved daily and get through my depression.
What a gift! What an effort!
I was moved to tears.
So every day since that day I’ve randomly picked a note and stuck it on my wall. It’s made a plain room colourful!
My mom was moved by my explanation and reminded me that I’ve got a good friend.
Mother dearest that girl is w.i.n.n.i.n.g
What a beautiful way to say “Hey girl! Keep your mind open and spirits high – I’m right here”.
I’ve fallen off so many times with this year feeling the worst so far but it’s things like that that offer a chispa of light that in time turns into a thriving flame.
Set me on fire.
I want to feel the burn.